Have you ever had a dream or a vision that pulled you to give it life, and yet, the fear of actually giving birth to it was bigger than the vision itself, so you decided that you needed to wait for a better moment, and you just gave up? What if the moment was now?
My five-year-old just had a birthday. I came into her room in the morning and snuggled with her while I wished her a happy birthday. I felt her little arms around my neck as she thanked me and then asked, “Why do these pajamas still fit me if I’m already five?” I smiled letting her know that we don’t just grow that quickly overnight.
Every day on her birthday I remember what happened the day she was born. I had an induction scheduled that day because, honestly, I just wanted her out. My back ached, my feet were sore, and I had already been pregnant twice before, and I was done! I stood in the kitchen that morning crying and telling my husband that I just didn’t think I could love another child. My heart apparently only had room for my other two. Izzy had been the “unplanned” baby.
My husband held me and told me that it would all be okay; that I would find it in my heart to love her too. So off to the hospital we went. There was no turning back.
Everything was flowing that day. The hospital had a room ready for me, I was given pitocin followed by an epidural, and I was just enjoying talking to my husband and the nurse who was assisting in the delivery room. Then my mom and my sister and best friend came to be a part of Izzy’s grand entrance into the world. Truly, it was a party in my room.
I was still not fully excited about the prospect of having another child – I truly enjoyed my full night’s sleep, my two other children being independent, and the fact that I had many things I wanted to accomplish that would make it a little more difficult with an additional child.
Quickly, I reached 10 cm and was ready to begin pushing this child out of me. Soon my life was about to change and I wasn’t sure I was ready. As I pushed, I remembered my conversation with my husband that morning in the kitchen – yes, I did have the audacity to have thoughts like that while pushing. You have to remember that I was numbed-up, so pain was non-existent, leaving me with a brain that could actually process thoughts.
As I continued to push, something magical, miraculous even, happened – my heart became so filled with love that I began to cry. My doctor asked if everything was okay, and I just nodded, not knowing how to express the emotions that were taking me over. One more push and she was out. I sobbed. My fear had given away to LOVE.
I held her in my arms, still with mucous covering her little body, and I cried. I cried thinking about how determined she had been to come into this planet and to bring such joy and happiness to all those who meet her.
Of course, all children come as a special gifts and it’s up to us to see that in the eyes of every child, not just our own, and validate that back to them.
The point of all of this, is just to say, that no matter what dreams, visions, children, or whatever it is we are birthing, we may not love the process, the pregnancy part and the delivery (and maybe even the “after part”), but if we stop just before the “baby” is birthed, we will never know how much joy and love that “baby” can bring to our lives and the lives of those around us.
Here’s a short imagery to help you have more ease from the planting of the seed to its birthing:
Put your right hand over heart and imagine a warm, beautiful red light encircling your heart chakra. Then envision this light traveling down into your womb area where the seed is growing. Now your heart is connected to the seed in your womb and love will continue to flow from your heart to the seed (vision), giving it the proper nutrients it needs to thrive.
Keep seeing the seed growing and your belly stretching. As you feel discomfort, increase the flow of the red light.
It’s now time for delivering the seed. As you push, continue to see the red light strengthening your muscles and assisting you in the delivery process.
This can be done daily as you grow and stretch in bringing your vision into reality.
As you birth the “baby” imagine the light now encircling your entire body and extending out to encircle the baby. This light will now carry you and the “baby” through as you continue to expand and grow in your journey together.
Oh, and don’t forget that growth doesn’t happen overnight. It requires patience and being in the present. So enjoy those pajamas while they still fit, for you know that when they no longer fit it’s time for a new birth. And, remember; CELEBRATE your “baby’s” birthday and your birthing day with lots of love – cupcakes and all!